I hate you I love you Always
by The-Lady-Insists
Summary: How can something so wrong bee so right? This is a story about pain, love, happiness, death and all the things between. This is Slash. Don't like don't read. The rest of you enjoy! Plz read my bio before reading story Rated M for safety.
1. Chapter 1

Please read my Bio before reading the story.

This is Jacob and Edward SLASH you have been warned. Don't like don't read.

_How can something so wrong be so right? This story contains pain, love, happniess, sorrow, death and all the thing between._

This is my first FF. Be kind.

Disclaimer: I own nothing. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Chapter 1

I hate you. I love you. Always.

"I can't believe you. Why would I imprint on a leech?" Jacob turned to Bella looking confused and annoyed.  
>"Jacob look at the signs, it's obvious". Bella said calmly.<p>

He scratched his head and thought about the previous week. That time in the school cafeteria how his pulse and heartbeat had quickened when Edward called out to him. But that was of course because Edward was an annoying leech, nothing more. There was however the recurring dreams that was a little more difficult to explain. They had started last week. Edward, bright as the sun, walking down the beach at La Push. It was calm and peaceful walking side by side holding hands. Or that other one when they were running through the forest. Jacob in his wolf form keeping even pace with Edward. They came to a clearing, a beautiful meadow, filled with flowers. Jacob had shifted and they tumbled down together on the grass. Jacob was naked but it didn't bother him at all.

"You are my moon." Edward said as he stroked Jacob's hair. Looking like the happiest man to walk this earth.  
>"You are my sun." Jacob smiled back at him leaning in to Edwards touch.<p>

Their faces getting closer, Jacob unconsciously liked his lips. They were so close that the cold breath from Edward mixed with Jacobs warm creating a delicious scent that aroused them both. They were just about to meet in a fiery kiss when Jacob had woken up heart beating hard. And to his surprise and chock that was not the only thing hard. He looked down and groaned. There was no other way to explain it than that he suffered from temporarily insanity. Bella sighed. Jacob could be so thickheaded sometimes.

When she first found out about Jacob and Edward for a short moment she felt disappointed and sad. She had always fancied Edward. Clever as she was she had quickly figured out that there was something odd about Edward. She had been driving her truck when a deer jumped out in front of her. She turned hard left. Now instead of towards a deer her truck was heading straight for the trees. Something had ripped off her car door and grabbed her. She had been held gently and her body was held close to a rock hard form. Bewildered she looked up and saw Edward Cullen! What the hell had happened how could he have done that? There wasn't a scratch on him. She shuddered feeling very cold and it took her a few seconds to realize it came from Edward.

"Are you all right?" he asked looking down at her. All Bella could do was to nod. He helped her stand, and she wobbled slightly. "Why are you so cold?" she asked eyes wide. What a weird thing to ask the person who had just saved her life. But she must be in shock not thinking straight. Edward looked back at her listening after her thoughts but there was only silence. She continued looking at the pale male in front of her. This was the first time that she had really seen him up close. His hair was fixed in a careful mess, his eyes looked golden. He really was pale. Edward pinched the bridge of his nose and frowned. At that moment Alice Hale, Edwards adopted sister, came skipping towards them. Bella starred wondering why she was there. "

"It´s ok Edward. Bella was going to find out eventually and we are going to be the best of friends." Alice said smiling at Bella.

To their surprise Bella accepted the whole thing about vampires being in Fork very quickly. It was too weird and mind-blowing that it couldn't be anything other than the truth. After all it wasn't the first time she had encountered the strange and supernatural. Her childhood friend Jacob Black had been sick she thought but it turned out to be something totally different. She was told that there was now ten wolfs in La Push and that they existed because of vampires. When Jacob had shifted and shown her his wolf shape for the first time, Bella was surprised and chocked but couldn't do more than accept the truth.

Bella had always been able to handle the weird things that popped up in her life well. But still, it was a big surprise that the vampires in Forks would be the Cullen's. She had been sure that Jacob had imprinted on Edward after Alice had come and talked to her after one of her visions. After Alice had told her Bella had been sworn to secrecy.

The kids from the reservation had started Forks High after a big fire that destroyed their school. It would take at least six months before the repairs would be finished. It had been a rocky start with vampires and wolfs distrusting each other. Even though they didn't like each other or got along that well they had reached a truce, simply that they would leave one another alone. However, being friends with Bella meant that Jacob and Edward had much more contact then the others. They weren't speaking much when they meet other than the standard greeting of:

"Leech."

"Dog."

They tried to be civil to each other for Bella's sake. Then something happened. At first neither of them noticed it. However they found themselves more and more occupying the same space. Edward told himself that it was because they both were friends with Bella. But last Wednesday they had without thought sat down at the same table in the school cafeteria, just the two of them. Jacob had been playing a game on his android phone while Edward sat silent beside him. He was thinking about a gift he was getting Esme, his adoptive mother. They just sat there in silence for half an hour.

Then Jacob's new classmates came and called him over to them. Jacob looked up and waved as he pocketed his cellphone and left to join them. Edward stayed in his seat looking after Jacob as he walked away. Edward felt confused. Then that Friday after school Edward was leaving, walking towards his silver Volvo and stopping midway. He saw a shirtless Jacob at the basketball court shooting hoops. Edward changed his steps and headed towards Jacob. He just stood there watching Jacob's movements. Jacob stopped and started to dribble the ball.

"Do you play?" he asked Edward.  
>"Sure if you wanna get beaten." Edward said he couldn't help himself from teasing the wolf.<br>"Give it your best shot." Jacob said accepting the challenge by throwing the ball to Edward. He caught the ball and stopped to remove his jacket.

"**H****e**_** doesn't stand a chance."**_ Edward smiled to himself when he heard Jacobs thoughts. "_**I'm gonna show this pup how it's done.**_" They were evenly matched, especially since Edward was forced to play at mere human speed in case someone was watching. Jacob jumped up to dunk the ball and Edward moved in to block him stretching out his hand. His hand glided down Jacob's bare chest and down his abs. Jacob lost his breath and focus.

They just stood there facing each other. Edwards hand had felt like cold silk sliding down his body making him shiver. Jacobs breathing sped up and his heart pounded in his chest. Edward still had his hand on Jacobs lower abs, he froze. The wolf had moaned in his mind from the pleasure he felt from his hand.

"_**Wow-What?**_" Jacob blinked and looked down at Edward's hand. Then he abruptly turned and ran for the forest. Edward stood there with his hand still outstretched. The warmth form Jacob's body still lingered on his fingers. He headed back to his car, very confused. It wasn't just Jacob who had felt something. Jacob's body had felt like velvet, warm like fire and he could clearly remember what his muscles had felt like when he flexed them under his hand.

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	2. Chapter 2

Please read my Bio before reading the story.

I wanna thank: Maisha, noonanna and oh2byoung for your sweet reviews. I hope you and all the those "silent readers" will keep reading and enjoy.

Disclaimer: I own nothing

Chapter 2

It was Sunday and for once the sun was shining. It felt like spring had really come. Jacob and Bella lay out on the grass of her backyard just enjoying a lazy Sunday afternoon. It was when Jacob had complained about the `freaking leech` for the seventh time that Bella's patience ran out.

"It's clear as day Jacob. Tell me; do you think about him several times a day? Do you dream about him? Do you see other people than him when he is around? Just look at the signs Jacob. We all see it and it's ok. You don't choose who you imprint on." Bella tried to sound supportive and understanding, to find something that would give her friend some comfort.

"Wait, what do you mean you all see it? " Jacob stood up from the blanket pacing back and forth.

"Well, Alice knows. And Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper and of course Carlisle and Esme." Bella said and shrugged

"What that's all? Doesn't the whole town of Forks share the same ridiculous idea?" Jacob felt worried and agitated. But he couldn't stop himself from asking the next question.

"What does Edward think?" He glanced down on Bella. He would never admit it but he was very curious about the answer.

"He is as pigheaded as you are and refuse to talk about it."

Jacob only nodded in acknowledgment and glad that at least the `damn leech´ agreed with him. There really wasn't a thing going on between them. At the same time he felt as though something pinched his heart. It hurt.

Being childish and silly Jacob and Bella decided to have one of their famous sleepovers. When Charlie, Bella's father, the Police Chief, opposed they argued it would shorten Jacob's way to school. Charlie gave in. He liked Jacob and didn't really have a problem with him staying over, on the couch. Horror movies, B-movies with bad acting and visual strings from UFO's were their favorite. Cuddled up together on the couch they started to watch the first movie, 'The Blob', a classic. Soda and candy filled up the coffee table. Halfway through the third movie Bella had dozed off and slept against Jacobs shoulder.

"Bells, it's time for bed." He shifted his arm around her back and picked her up bridal style. Gently he laid her down on her bed and pulled up her covers around her. He kissed her forehead and went back downstairs to the couch. He lay down but got up again taking of his t-shirt and jeans. Stripped down to only his boxers he laid down again with a pillow and a soft blanket. He pressed play on the DVD.

The movie continued. It happened to be about a vampire who struggled with the thought of having a soul or not. The vampire cried every time he bit a bombshell of a woman who feebly tried to fight him of. It wasn't a very good movie, more in the C-category of movies than B. Jacob soon drifted off to sleep with one last thought; "_**Stupid leech". **_

It so happened that the dream which was becoming clearer in his mind was much like the movie. Now the unknown vampire was transformed into Edward Cullen. But Edward wasn't bitter and depressed like the vampire from `Vampire suck II` instead he was again bright as the sun.

He was wearing a tight gray jumper that enhanced his upper body, fitting nicely around his muscles. He had matched it with a pair of black jeans and black and red converse. As always his hair was fixed in a careful mess. His eyes, so warm they looked like embers, he truly was beautiful. Edward looked directly at Jacob with a soft smile on his lips. Oh those lips, they were practically begging to be kissed and Jacob wanted to. He reached out his hand, grabbing Edward pulling him closer.

"I will suck your blood" Edward repeated the cheesy line from the movie and lowered himself down on top of Jacob. He didn't try to stop him he just tilled his head a little giving the vampire better access.

What happened next did not happen in the movie. Edward's cold wet tongue started to lick his neck, nibbling on it. Jacob gasped from pleasure as he moaned enticing the God in his dream on. Cold touches of silk began to caress his body stopping shortly at Jacob's nipples, then so very painfully slow, making their way down towards the hem of his boxers. Jacob almost lost himself gasping and moaning Edward's name praying silently that it would never end. Jacob became greedier and tilted the vampire's head up to face him. They meet in an explosive kiss, oh the taste. Jacob doubted he would ever find anything that tasted or felt as good as this. Eagerly they deepened the kiss. Jacob lifted up and removed Edward's shirt to get better access to his bare skin and touch as much of it as he could. Such a wonderful body. Edward moaned into Jacob's mouth and hissed when he started to unbutton his jeans. For each button Jacob nudged slightly the hard dick. They stopped the kissing so he could pull down the jeans. Edward leaned down again but this time laid his whole body on top of Jacob. Velvet and silk coming together, soft and hard at the same time. They pressed against each other. Feeling the other ones arousal spurred them on. Jacob grabbed Edwards hair pulling it as he started to kiss his neck. They were completely lost in each other.

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	3. Chapter 3

Please read my Bio before reading the story.

Thank you again a for your reviews. Makes me so happy to hear that you enjoy it.

I know this chapter is a bit short.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter 3

Edward had heard about Jacob and Bella's sleepover but he wasn't going to check it out. Honest. He told himself that he was just out walking and happened to be near Bella's house. Denial wasn't just a river in Egypt. He heard someone gasp his name and he stopped and listened. He heard it again but this time it was followed by "_**Oh God! Oh God yes Edward!"**_ He realized that the voice belonged to Jacob Black. What was he doing? Curiosity overcame him and he headed towards Bella's house. It was dark and silent except for Jacobs moans. Carefully he opened the kitchen window and jumped in. He felt like a burglar sneaking in like this but he had to find out what Jacob was doing. The first thing that hit him walking between the kitchen and living room was Jacob's scent full of arousal. Edward bit down on his lip and continued forward.

Images and thoughts flooded his mind. Flashes of Jacobs's extremely vivid dream filled his head. He stopped and took a breath. Big mistake. Jacobs scent over powered him. His heart, if it could beat, would have sent him in to cardiac arrest. Edward new he should leave and never think of this again, but he couldn't, instead he moved forward. He just had to see him once, then he would leave. The blanket that covered Jacob had fallen down on the floor. There was nothing but the thin fabric of his boxers that poorly hid the obvious hard on, a big bulge, which was almost begging to be touched. Edward just stood there taking in all of Jacob. He licked his lips as he saw in Jacobs's mind how he licked and kissed his neck. He needed to leave. He felt his own arousal getting stronger.

"Kiss me Edward." Jacob said. For a split second Edward feared that Jacob had woken up. He realized that he was only talking in his sleep. He should go, he really should.

"Kiss me, kiss me Edward." Jacob moaned again.

Edward battled with his conscience, he could absolutely not kiss Jacob. First of all the wolf was asleep. Second they should be mortal enemies. The memory of feeling Jacob's hot velvet skin surfaced. His thoughts drifted to dangerous waters wondering what it would feel and taste like to kiss those soft lips. NO! He was better than this. He wasn't some creepy stalker that attacked sleeping... sleeping miracles. When had Jacob become so beautiful, so handsome, and so sexy?

"Please, please Edward, please." Jacob pleaded with a soft seductive voice. This was driving the poor vampire insane.

Those lips, the sounds Jacob was making, the memory of his skin and the flashes of his vivid dream. They made him step closer to the couch, leaning down. Just one kiss he thought, he was begging for it after all. Slowly he lowered down to kiss those lips that had been calling and begging for him. Just one kiss.

Evil I know ^.^

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	4. Chapter 4

Please read my Bio before reading my story.

Thank you all for the reviews. I'm so glad that you like it. I enjoy writing it. Plz continue to r/r

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter 4

Edward had been foolish enough to think that only one kiss would suffice. He had planned to softly give Jacob a chaste kiss on the lips and then leave. Jacob wrapped up in his dream had other plans. As soon as their lips touched, Jacob grabbed his hair pulling him down. He deepened their kiss. The kiss itself wasn't very stylish but it exploded in desire, need and lust. Before Edward could stop himself he moaned into Jacob's mouth and ran his hand through Jacob's long hair. The other hand touched Jacob's chest and abs. He followed Jacobs dream and slowly made his way down his neck licking and kissing lightly. Jacobs scent was nothing compared to his taste. He felt like he could stay and do this forever.

Edward jumped up on the kitchen counter and out the window. He landed without a sound and headed to the forest. He had heard Bella opening her bedroom door and she was now coming down the stairs. It had taken him longer than usual to notice her. He had been too wrapped up in Jacob. He knew he would never forget the sounds, smell or the taste of that kiss. It suddenly dawned on him that even if he desired Jacob more than anything in his whole existence, he never once wanted to bite him. Sure, he could hear his heart beat and his blood pumping through his veins, but nothing. All he wanted was to cherish him, be close to him. Love him.

Bella went up to the couch and saw the almost naked Jacob lying there with an impressive hard on. Slightly embarrassed she picked up the blanket and covered him up.

"Edward." Jacob sighed. Bella thought that Edward was a lucky sod for getting such a nice guy like Jacob. She loved him dearly as a brother and he loved her as much as a precious sister.

Monday morning Jacob woke up feeling relaxed and cheerful. It lasted about a minute and a half before he felt the wetness and sticky feeling in his boxers. It all came crushing down on him. His vivid dream of Edward and him, it had felt so real. A part of him was disappointed that it had only been a dream. The other part was freaking out. Bella called for him from the kitchen to come get his breakfast. They were going to be late for school.

"Just a moment I'll be right there." Jacob called back and ran up the stairs two steps at a time. He took off his messy boxers and shoved them in his pocket. He showered in record time and put on his black Metallica t-shirt and black jeans. Coming down the stairs he was combing his hair with his fingers before tying it back with a rubber band. Bella was waiting for him at the front door. She handed over a couple of sandwiches and a bottle of juice. They got in her truck and were off to school. Jacob sat at on the passenger seat trying not to think about his dream. If they could really be that close without wanting to rip each other apart then what did it mean? Maybe Bella was right. A big part of him secretly wished for it.

Of course it wouldn't go unnoticed. Edward knew that Alice would have seen him disappear or at least become a blur in his vision. It annoyed her very much that she couldn't see the wolves. But it was Rosalie that caught up and raised the subject first. She noticed the smell from Edward. She had pretty good guess about who Edward had spent the night with.

"What is that smell? It smells like wet dog." She complained and pinched her nose. Emmett came and stood beside his love and looked down from the upper floor with a wicked grin. Edward clearly heard him. "_**Have you been out playing fetch? Was he a good doggie?" **_Edward just glared at him and ignored Rosalie. Sometimes having siblings was nothing but a bother. Emmett chuckled thinking he was very amusing. Alice joined him smiling. _**"I'm so happy for you. When will you make it official?"**_ Alice had seen Jacob, a blurry Jacob, become part of their family and she was eager to welcome him. Edward just shook his head. Alice looked surprised. _**"But I don't understand. I've seen, well not seen, but you disappeared from my sight and you really do smell like him." **_Edward walked toward his room, he really needed to shower and change his clothes before school. Alice laid her hand on his arm stopping him.

"Just leave it Alice. Please. I know what you think will happen but this isn't it."

"But you do like him don't you?" She squeezed his arm a little.

"He is the most beautiful person I've ever seen. Even if I were to kiss a thousand other people it would never feel, or taste, like this. Not that I would want to." Edward said as quiet as possible, only wanting Alice to know. Not that Rosalie would care anymore. She and Emmett was caught up in one of those `You are my world` gases. Alice smiled at Edward and let him go. She hoped that he could be happier about it. She sighed and went to find Jasper and get ready for school.

^.^

AN: Don't hate Bella for interrupting.

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	5. Chapter 5

Please read my Bio before reading my story.

_Hello dear readers. Thanx to all of you that are staying with the story. Like your reviews alot :D It makes me so happy that people enjoy what I write._  
><em>Sorry It has taken so long to update I've been busy and then ill.<em>  
><em>I'll be going on vacation soon. Hopefully I will get chapter 6 up before I leave next week.<em>

_Question! I've been thinking about puting up longer chapters insteed of 1000+w more like 2000+w. Good or bad_ ?

_Thanx again for reading. ^.^_

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter 5

Bella and Jacob arrived at school just in time. Jacob felt uneasy looking around the parking lot. He was praying that the leech's stupid shiny silver Volvo wouldn't be there. But of course it was. He wanted to pull his hair in sheer anxiety. Thinking about the shining and bright Edward from his dream, Jacob's entire soul wanted to be near him. The last shred of his sanity, as he saw it, was angry and revolted by it. Or maybe he was developing multiple personalities. He hoped at least that he wouldn't run into him today. They didn't have any classes together.

"Jacob, come on. Hurry up, we will be late." Bella called back at him. Jacob didn't mind being late, or for that matter, not to be at school at all.

"Edward?" His Spanish teacher looked at him. "Are you all right?" She looked worried.

"Yes, I'm sorry." Edward said sitting straighter in his chair. Once again he found himself completely lost in thoughts concerning Jacob. This wasn't going to end well if a few thoughts of Jacob could disarm him..

"Then do you know the answer?" She asked him.

He quickly filtered through her mind and found the correct answer which he then told her, in flawless Spanish.

"Gracias Señor Cullen."

He gave her a nod. Edward (fell back into his daydreaming about Jacob, he) felt ashamed and guilty for what he had done the previous night to Jacob. How could he? How could he not…

He let his mind wander; jumping between the minds of his fellow students, he needed the distraction. He quickly became bored when there it was, clearer than all the others, Jacob's thoughts. He wanted to see him and changed to Mike Newton who sat beside him. My god it felt like he hadn't seen him in years, so bright and sweet.

"_**I wonder if I should ask him out on Wednesday. Like watch a movie, just the two of us, alone in the dark movie theater."**_

Mike Newton how dared he! Edward was furious. He heard him voice the question to the love of his life. He watched tensed and waited for Jacobs reply. There was no chance in hell that Jacob would say yes, right?

"What's that Mike, a movie? Sure it could be fun." Jacob said and smiled at that vile Mike Newton.

Oh hell no! There weren't going to be any movie. Edward's mind went dark.

"Do you want me to pick you up?" Mike asked smiling back at Jacob felling very pleased with himself. Edward sat frozen in his chair, what was Jacob doing? He shifted back to Jacob's mind but all he got was the list of movies that was playing. Edward wanted to pulverize Mike.

"_**Edward what's wrong?" **_Emmett asked with genuine concern. He looked at his brother wondering what could have changed his mood so drastic. Edward just shook his head. _**"Come on man I'm guessing it has something to do with Jacob."**_

"No, well it's despicable Mike Newton. He has asked Jacob out and Jacob said yes." Edward mumbled to Emmett below human hearing.

"_**What? I thought you two were a match made in heaven, or something like that." **_Emmett tried to lighten Edward's mood but noticed that now was not the time for that.

"We are. I'm gonna have a long conversation with him later." Edward hissed getting, if possible, even more pissed.

"_**Calm down man. Don't do anything stupid. You know you don't think all that clearly when it's about him."**_

"Don't worry. I will handle it."

Emmett was about to tell him to wait and calm down again when the bell rang. Edward left the classroom as quickly as human speed let him. There was a fifteen minute break before the next lesson. Enough time to speak with his wolf. Jacob and Mike were leaving math class and were heading toward the common room.

"_**It will be good to do this. A movie and getting out of Forks. That will set my mind straight." **_Jacob was sure of that. Edward almost lost it. His otherwise cool and calm face expression changed. He still looked like a God, but a furious one.

"Jacob" He called out coming up behind them. _**"O no!" **_Jacob panicked.

O yes Jacob Black, Edward thought. Both Jacob and Mike actually flinched when they turned around and saw a very upset Edward Cullen.

"Later Jake," Mike said and hurried of. That Cullen could be pretty scary.

"Let's talk." Edward almost growled at Jacob who wanted nothing more than to run away. They walked in silence and stopped at the far end of the parking lot sheltered from sight by the trees.

"_**Why, why is this my luck? What should I say? Crap I'm going blank!"**_

Edward took a step closer to Jacob.

"What do you want?" Jacob asked trying to sound annoyed.

Edward took another step closer to Jacob. They were so close now, only inches apart. Deep down inside of Jacob something cheered at the proximity. His breathing picked up smelling Edward who had the best scent in the world. But he couldn't focus on that now, he needed a clear head. The scent brought back flashes from his dream. Edward relaxed and changed from a furious God to a bright and beautiful God. His eyes before stormy and hard were now soft pools of melted gold seeing only Jacob.

"Are you really going out with Mike on Wednesday?" He asked calmly.

"Yeah. Why not? There is a movie I wanna see." Jacob said and almost made it sound casual.

"Are you sure" Edward leaned in and whispered in Jacobs's ear. The cold breath made his ear tingle, making him shiver. Edward let his index finger stroke down from Jacobs shoulder down his arm to his hand, leaving a trace of cold silk on his bare arm.

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	6. Chapter 6

Plz read my bio before reading story.

Thanx for r/r :) I think I will write longer chapters seems so short now.

I made it. Didn't think I would have time to post this chapter.

Now I'm of to Europe :D

Disclaimer: I own nothing  
>...<p>

Chapter 6

Are you sure Edward had asked him. Sure about what exactly? His mind was in chaos. The school bell rang. Had it already been fifteen minutes? They stood still close to each other. Then Edward took a step back.

"Don't leave," Jacob said and grabbed Edward's hand. He didn't realize what he was doing; it was like he was on autopilot. Edward tangled his fingers with Jacob's. Fire and ice the two coming together. Jacob looked up at Edward who looked brighter than the sun, so beautiful.

"What do you want?" Edward turned back the question on Jacob.

"I don't know. I'm confused. Just...just stay like this for a moment longer." He gripped the silk like hand tighter.

"Whatever you wish," Edward said and pressed back.

They didn't care that they now would be late for class. At that moment no one existed but them.

"_**What do I do now?" **_Edward heard Jacob struggle with his feelings.

"Do you want to go back to school?" Edward asked him. He had no wish to do so but small steps he reminded himself. He knew he couldn't rush Jacob.

"No."

"Ok."

"Just stand still," Jacob told him. He released his hand from Edward's who frowned a bit at that not wanting to let go. Then he felt warmth going around his waist stopping at his lower back. Jacob lightly pressed against him and put his head on Edward's shoulder. Jacob could hardly believe how well he his body matched Edward's it felt so natural and right. Edward did as he was told and stood absolutely still. When Jacob sighed and leaned in and embraced him tighter Edward broke his statuesque like pose, he wanted to hold Jacob as well. One hand slid up Jacobs arm and down his back stopping shortly below his shoulder blade. Edward decided to risk it and raised his other hand and gently let his fingers run through Jacobs's long hair. They embraced each other with more force. It was like they couldn't get close enough. This was so right. It felt like their whole existence was given a higher purpose. Edward could feel Jacob's heart beat strong. It was almost like he shared that beating heart with him.

True, it felt so right, but a small part of Jacob felt this was so wrong. He reluctantly let go of Edward.

"What?" He asked him.

"I'm sorry. I can't." Jacob couldn't even look at Edward as he spoke. He knew that if he did his determination would falter. He tried to pass Edward but he stopped him.

"What? Why? Jacob, tell me what you're thinking."

"Why? Can't you just read my mind?" He answered in a cold voice. He walked away from Edward.

He and Bella had driven to school in Bella's truck but it didn't matter. He could shift and run as a wolf down to La Push, to safety. Edward had tried not to read his mind. He wanted Jacob to speak out instead. Some thoughts slipped through anyway._** "My father would die from chock. The pack would never allow it. They would cast me out. I hate you for ruining my life." **_Jacob knew his thoughts had been cold and hurtful but it was needed. He needed it to be harsh for him to stay determined. As he crossed the invisible boarder of the treaty he slowed down. Sam's consciousness melted with his. He and the rest of the pack would all know about this now that Jacob had shifted.

"_**Jake let's talk." **_Sam said in a worried tone.

"_**There is nothing to talk about. It's over." **_

"_**Jacob, meet me at the beach by the rocks." **_Sam used his Alfa influence. Jacob didn't really have to listen and obey it being an Alfa himself, but he did.

He got to the beach before Sam. He put on his pants that he had stashed in his pouch. Sam emerged a few minutes later wearing a pair of cut of jeans.

"Is it true that you imprinted on a lee...vampire? How is it possible?" Sam looked both surprised shocked, but mostly he looked worried.

"I guess so, but I'm not any more. I've ended it." Jacob said rubbing his hand over his face.

"But how is it possible?" Sam wanted to know.

"I don't know. Ok?" Jacob felt tired and stressed.

"What will happen now? The others will demand answers."

"I know! My dad will die from shock and the pack will want nothing to do with me. Honestly Sam, if I had any answers I would gladly give them to you. I'm just lost."

Sam hesitated for a moment.

"But Jake... no one has ever gone back on an imprint before. When you do imprint on someone it's for life."

"Right… And I will be the cause of my father's death and for causing chaos in the pack. No way. I've told you, it's over." Jacob snapped at Sam.

"I'm sorry Sam this is not your fault." Jacob said and patted Sam's shoulder. He felt a bit bad snapping at him. He knew Sam only wanted to help.

"We need to discuss this with the rest of the pack and your father. I know you don't want to but we must." Sam added when Jacob was about to protest. Jacob hung his head, he knew Sam was right. He really wished that he could be somewhere else, any place but here right now.

...  
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	7. Chapter 7

Plz read my bio before reading my story.  
>Hello my faithful readers. I'm back from Portugal totaly loved it over there. I didn't want to go back to the cold, dark and snowie Sweden. I wanna thank you all for keeping up with the story.<br>A few of you have asked if I will continue this story and the answer is Yes.  
>Thank you for reading. Cookies for all ;)<p>

(Also I'm not sure if this type of writing is called AU?)

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter 7

Jacob felt very uncomfortable when they all gathered; all the pack members as well as his father and himself. They had met outside and they all sat around the fire they'd made. It was Sam who started to talk.

"I have something to tell you. Please listen to all of it before you say something." Sam looked at each and one of them before he continued.

"We all know that Jake hasn't shifted in a while. There is a good reason why he hasn't. Something has happened and even though it's a private matter it concerns us all."

The group started to stir a bit, getting anxious.

"Jacob has imprinted." Sam continued. "He claims that he has ended the imprinting and that it's all over, but going back in an imprint has never been heard of before."

"But what's so bad about imprinting? We will all do it at some point." Paul interrupted. Several others agreed with him. Jacobs's father sat quiet and observed his son. Jacobs head hung low and it looked like he wanted to be swallowed up by the earth.

"Quiet!" Sam barked. They all fell silent again.

"Paul is right, all of us will, or have already, imprinted on someone. However, Jacob's imprinting is different. He has not imprinted on another shifter or human. Jake's imprint is the vampire Edward Cullen."

Everyone's eyes went wide, and there were gasps of shock. Embry and Lea said they didn't believe it, Paul's jaw dropped. Seth, sweet Seth, although shocked as the rest, he smiled shyly at Jacob to comport him and squeezed his shoulder lightly. It was all he could do because he didn't know what to say. He was the one that could socialize with the vampires the best. He didn't like them, nor did he dislike them, and that Alice vamp seemed to be ok. As Sam had predicted all the other wolves wanted answers, answers he couldn't give. Finally Jacob took hold of his last bit of courage and looked up at his father. He was sure he would see disgust and hurt in his eyes. Billy Black met his son's gaze with tears in his eyes. That was even worse. He wanted to say how sorry he was and that he really had put an end to it.

"It can't be done. You can't break an imprint. It would only happen if one of the two ceased to exist. Only then would the bond truly be broken." Billy Black said with a sad and worried voice. This was not what he'd wished for his son. He continued.

"I will tell you a story about our ancestors. Not many know about it. In fact, I think there are only three people including myself who knows about it. I would never tell you about it if this hadn't happened." Billy leaned forward in his chair as the pack leaned in closer to hear his tale.

"_It happened when the cold ones first come to Forks. It was the Cullen's but they had one more person in their clan. I believe her name was Imslie. She was not originally part of the Cullen clan, she had migrated from Scotland. The fact that she also was a vegetarian like the Cullen's made her accepted and welcomed to join them. When our ancestors come upon the cold ones, Red Star, my grandfather's father's brother, looked upon Imslie. She was bathing in light bright as the sun."_

Jacob swallowed hard not liking where this was going. He nervously bit his lip.

"_He knew he had imprinted on her. When the others found out what had happened the rest of the pack and tribe became furious. They told him to end it, but he couldn't. They met in secret as their bond grew stronger. Finally he was told that he had to choose, Imslie or his own people and the pack. Imslie didn't want Red Star to suffer and told him they should try to stop seeing each other. They tried, they really did, but the imprinting was like a silent calling or yearning. They realized it wouldn't end. The need and desire to be with each other was too strong."_

It was dead silent when Billy paused in his story.

"_A shifter is a human who can die from wounds and sickness. A vampire can only die from one thing. They need to be torn apart and then the parts set on fire. Or actually, only fire is needed. _

_Imslie's love for Red Star was so great that even if she wished to spend eternity with him, she wouldn't make him choose between his family and her. She didn't want him to make such a sacrifice. None of the ancestors or the Cullens were present at the time. But it's told that she set herself on fire. She knew that the Cullens would never aid her, so she did the only thing she could think of. She drenched her self in gasoline then stroke the match and set herself on fire. Nothing but ash was found. She might have thought she did Red Star a favor and helped him. But when the bond broke, so did he. In just a few months his sanity started to decrease. He was convinced that Imslie was still alive. He talked to her as if she was right there beside him. During the nights her death became real again and he screamed in his dreams most of the night from loss and pain. At the end he stopped talking just staring at nothing, eyes empty. He wouldn't eat or drink and finally his body gave up as his mind already had. His last words before he died were "I'm sorry."_

"It was then it was decided that no matter whom one would imprint on, he or she was to be accepted and protected by the whole tribe. They would be for our tribe members a sister, brother, cousin, son, daughter, or friend. No one should suffer such a fate because of love." Billy Black leaned back in his chair again gazing in to the fire. They all sat quietly thinking about what Billy had just told them.

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	8. Chapter 8

Plz read my bio before reading.

_Hi all I'm just reposting chapter 8. Im very ill indeed. My cold, for the last 4 weeks, is pneumonia. :(  
>So to be continued...when I'm healty again.<em>

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter 8

At the Cullen's they had a family crisis meeting. They all sat in the living room. Alice and Jasper on one couch, Emmett sat in an armchair with Rosalie on his lap. Carlisle and Esme sat next to Edward on the other big white couch. This moment felt like torture for a lot of reasons. Edward felt that he really was the only one alone. Especially since he´d just had his whole reason for existing ripped away from him. They were all silent, this was a serious matter. Even Rosalie who normally could say something sarcastic and annoying was quiet. She couldn't imagine being without the love of her life, Emmett.

"We all remember what happened to Imslie and the tragic fate both she and Red Star suffered." Carlisle said. They all did, it had been a horrible time. There was nothing they could do. They were all forced to watch from the sidelines unable to help.

"None of us here would want Edward or Jacob Black to suffer like that." Carlisle stated what everyone was feeling.

"Talk to us Edward." Esme said with motherly warmth.

"I know Jacob still battles with the whole imprint thing. I know he wants it as much as I do, but he fights it. I feel empty and in pain, all at the same time. When Alice told me about her vision, how certain it was, I only hesitated for a moment before I accepted it. Since then I've been waiting for Jacob to accept it as well. When he finally admitted it that moment felt like heaven and the next moment it all turned to hell. It hurts so much."

It wasn't often Edward spoke like this, pouring his heart out. But Edward felt that this was too much to keep inside. They all wanted to help him so badly.

"Does Jacob's family know?" Esme asked him

"I think they do now. Jacob shifted earlier when he ran away. The wolves all share the same consciousness and if the pack knows then I'm sure Billy Black would be told," Edward said sounding so tired. Vampires weren't supposed to be tired.

Alice sat silent, she didn't want to tell them that her vision of Jacob being part of their family had become unclear. Even if she had only seen him has a blur shape it had been a clear blur shape sort of fixed. Alice could never see a clear face or body of the members of the wolf pack, she only recognised them by their blury shape pattern. Jacob had been, from the start, a softer blur with more distinct features. Now he wasn't there most of the time, and when he was it was very vaguely.

"You need to speak with him again. I know it's difficult and that you can't go over there because of the treaty... Maybe it's time to renegotiate the treaty." Carlisle said trying to sound hopeful.

They made a plan. Carlisle would call Billy Black and Edward would talk to Jacob in school.

Edward wasn't thrilled about the idea. If Jacob denied him again he feared that it would be more than he could handle.

Tuesday morning Edward felt like he had been hit by ten bulldozers. His appearance that was always flawless lacked that spark he usually had. He saw Bella in school but she wasn't much help, her mind being silent as always. He didn't see Jacob anywhere and his motorbike wasn't in the parking lot. In fact the Cullen's noticed that none of the La Push kids were at school. That was odd. Edward sat through school in agony. On his way home he called Carlisle. He had called the Black residence several times but there was no answer. Finally the whole Cullen clan left to the invisible line where the treaty started. Edward tried to hear their thoughts, but there was nothing. Even their scent was more faint than usual. Emmett took a step forward, it meant he was about to break the treaty. But he didn't care, the rules didn't apply anymore. Carlisle stopped him.

"It's too risky. Before we talk with them we can't break the treaty. We can't take that risk Emmett. It could lead to war between us. I'm sorry Edward." Carlisle added.

There was no one home at the Black residence. After meeting with the pack Billy, who also was a tribe elder, decided that this was something that needed the involvement of all the tribe elders. There was a place, a small island that was scared to the tribe. It was a well-guarded secret from the vampires. When Billy approached the other elders they didn't object to the suggestion. They all crossed over in different motorboats, it only took ten minutes. Tents were put up and fires were started, they would all stay there until the next day. They sat in a circle around the fire. Jacob sat with the elders and the pack members sat around them.

"I think you all know why we are here." Billy started the meeting. "Amongst us elders there is only three of us who know the tale of Imslie and Red Star. I've told the pack the story and I think I'll need to tell it once more. Then you will understand how terribly serious this is." So he told the tragic story once again. It didn't have less effect on the wolves who heard it for a second time.

"Jacob has imprinted on a cold one, they are our enemies. We let them be and they let us be, much of this because they are vegetarians and the treaty. I believe that it's time to renegotiate our treaty, the old rules are no more." Billy leaned back in his chair.

Another elder spoke up. "What will happen with the imprinting is something only Jacob can decide. However, I believe that I speak for the whole tribe when I say that no one would want Jacob to be ill. Or worse die. Do not worry about the tribe or your pack Jacob. Even if some won't understand in the beginning, no one will blame or shun you. You Jacob Black is a part of this tribe forever, no matter whom you've imprinted on. "

The others nodded in agreement.

Jacob had said that he could and had ended the imprinting with Edward. Now almost a whole day had passed and the place where his heart was beating was beginning to feel like an empty hole. He was scared, more than he would admit. The story his father had told them frightened him. Sure, he might be able to resist the imprinting. But doing so at the expense of Edward's existence …. Just the thought of it made Jacob feel sick. He ran up from the circle to the nearest bush and vomited but it didn't make him feel any better afterwards.

"Jacob." His father called for him.

"I'm sorry. I couldn't help it." He said feeling guilty.

"Jacob it has begun. Your resisting the imprinting has begun to affect you. I...I think it will begin to affect Edward as well." Billy said gravely.

"How do you feel Jacob?" His father asked him.

"It hurts so much. It's only been a day, but I feel sick and empty," he answered truthfully. He didn't have the energy to feel self-conscious about it.

"Son, would you consider talking to Edward again? No promises, just talk. We are all behind you. All we want is for you to be happy and healthy." His father pushed him a bit. If there was anything at all he could do to help his son he would.

Jacob's biggest reason for denying Edward had been that he was afraid his father would die of shock and that his pack members would shun him. Now that he knew they all stood behind him it was different. He just had to be honest with himself and stop fighting. His stubborn side had lessened a bit but it still held on tight. Jacob didn't sleep much that night, he kept tossing and turning. Each time he closed his eyes he saw Edward smiling but he was surrounded by fire. Jacob cursed himself for being so stupid and stubborn. Ninety-five percent of him wanted his Edward but the other five percent still caused him to hesitate. _**"Why couldn't I just embrace my feelings and accept them**_" he wondered.

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_This chapter was hell to write I almost gave it up. Hope you enjoyed it. _


	9. Chapter 9

Plz read my bio before reading.

I'm finally back. Thanx for wating. My cold werent a cold but pnumonia, surprise! So it's taken five weeks to get better. I can not recommend it, sucks. Enjoy faithful and new readers!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

XOXOXOXOX

Chapter 9

How can you die when you're already dead? It had been almost two and a half day since Edward last saw or heard something of Jacob. He couldn't pretend that he was ok any longer. Yesterday he faked it through the day somehow. Today was hell. His ability to read minds had faded a little and so had his hunger. What would happen if he stopped eating?

He stood on the second floor balcony just looking out over the forest, not really seeing it. He let out a high cry of pain and fell to his knees. His family rushed to him at once.

"Edward, what's wrong?" Emmett asked him.

"I can't... I can feel...my bond with Jacob…it's breaking." Edward gasped.

"How do you know?" Jasper asked next. He could sense the fear and pain emanating from Edward.

"Because I'm ceasing to exist." Edward whispered as he pulled down his V-necked jumper. There over his heart cracks had begun to form. His skin looked like cracked glass stretching upward.

"No Edward." Esme cried out horrified.

"How can this be Carlisle? How is it possible?" Emmett asked Carlisle who always had a wise answer.

"I don't know Emmett. I've never seen or heard of this before. Help him to his room." Carlisle was deeply troubled and worried. He knew how to treat a sick human but how did you treat a sick vampire? Vampires weren't even supposed to get sick.

They laid him down on the bed in his room. Shortly after Alice had told him about her vision and he had accepted the imprinting he bought a bed. A king sized bed for Jacob to sleep in if and when he would want to. He wanted him to feel welcomed and comfortable.

"Lie down and rest Edward. I will stay here while the others find out what's happening." Esme sat down beside him on the bed. For that he was grateful.

The others stood in the living room not knowing what to do.

"Rosalie. No!" Alice called out.

"Enough!" She said and was already out the door.

"I'll bring her back." Alice said to the three confused males and ran after Rosalie. In her vision she had seen Rosalie break the treaty. She caught up with her.

"Don't try to stop me Alice."

"I won't. I'm here to help. Before I agreed with Carlisle but now it has gone too far. We need to do all we can to help Edward."

Rosalie smiled at Alice glad that she was there wanting to help. Together they broke the treaty.

Red Star had become insane at the loss of his imprint. Could it be that even a vampire could be affected in the same way? Edward knew he couldn't die or get sick but he could stop existing. Imslie had stopped and it was then _after_ her lover had suffered from his insanity. So why was he affected now? Jacob wasn't dead was he? Pain and dread filled Edward he couldn't just lie here he needed to find Jacob. He tried to sit up but fell backwards screaming. It hurt like nothing he ever felt before. Not even his transformation from human to vampire had caused him so much pain. The cracks spread upwards up over his collarbone they now looked like long burn marks. _**"Jacob's dead, he is dead."**_ That thought, emptiness and pain were the only things left inside of Edward. The cracks continued to spread slowly up his throat and neck.

"Jasper come quick." Esme called out. He was there in half a second followed by Emmett and Carlisle.

"What is it? What is happening?" Jasper felt like he could touch the pain he sensed in the room coming from Edwad and Esme's worry emanating from her making the air thick with feelings.

"Please help him calm down. I think his panic makes the cracks worse." She got up from the bed and let Jasper sit down. He channeled all his emotions of calm to Edward and it slowly worked, in a way.

Edward closed his eyes, stopped his breathing and laid still. Then there was nothing. Jasper couldn't get a single emotion from Edward. It was just empty. The cracks that now reached all the way up to the middle of his throat and neck stopped spreading as well. They looked like third degree burn marks.

"EDWARD! EDWARD CAN YOU HEAR ME?" Jasper shock and shouted at his brother. There was no answer, no response. Jasper was terrified.

The elders and the pack had come back from their meeting. The new treaty had been decided and if the Cullens didn't agree on the terms the old one was to take effect immediately again.

The new treaty was as follows:

*No members of the Cullens were to be harmed.

*If any members of the Cullens bit or turned a human the treaty was broken immediately.

*The Cullens were now if needed allowed to be on Quileute land.

Jacob had more or less, about 99 percent decided that he would speak with Edward again.

Rosalie and Alice came across a very surprised Seth as they ran towards Jacob Black's house. They all froze where they stood. This was a very delicate situation. Seth was weary and his body started to shake.

"Don't be afraid. It's Seth right?" Alice said and smiled friendly at him. "You remember me? I'm Alice and this is Rosalie." She nodded at her sister.

"I remember. What are you doing here?" Seth asked them. He knew Alice from school and even if she was a vampire he thought that she seemed pretty cool and the nicest of them all.

"It's Edward, something is very wrong with him. We need to find Jacob, we know about the imprint thing." Alice said and took a small step forward. "Will you help us?"  
>"Follow me." Seth said and started to run toward Jacob's house.<p>

Jacob had seen them coming from the window and went out to meet them. He stood on his porch looking first at the vampires and then at Seth. He looked terrible. He was very pale with dark circles under his eyes. It looked like he would collapse at any moment.

"They say it's something wrong with Edward and wanted to talk with you." Seth explained.

A chill ran through Jacob.

"What's wrong with him?"

"We don't know. He.. he has started to come apart." Rosalie said.

"Come apart? What does that mean?" Jacob was confused.

"It means he is ceasing to exist." Rosalie hissed her voice filled with anger and worry.

"_**Not existing? Not existing? Oh God NO!" **_It kept repeating like a mantra in Jacob's head and he started to hyperventilate. Then it all turned black.

__XOXOXOX

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	10. Chapter 10

Plz read bio before reading.

Sweetest ff-readers thank you for your reviews, keeps me going. I'll hope All of you will continue to read, love it and review it. (Don't have to love it. I'm fine with liking it.)

So I figured I should hurry up the next chapter and not let you suffer while waiting for the next chapter of awesomeness ;) I think, sadly, that chapter 11 will take a while. Plz be patience.

Happiness and harmony to all = )

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

XOXOXOXO

Chapter 10

Beside Edward laid Jacob, both still, Jacob's breaths shallow.

"It's only been a couple of hours. Let's wait a while longer. I'm afraid it's all we can do." Carlisle tried to comfort the others. When Jacob had collapsed on the porch they had decided to bring him to the Cullen home. Seth went along with them.  
>"What's wrong with Edward?" He asked Carlisle.<p>

"I don't know. As far as I know, this has never happened to a vampire before. It's like he's shut down." Carlisle frowned. "It shouldn't be possible. We and our bodies don't function as humans. If Edward was human I would say he was comatose. Wolf-vampire imprinting is really rare and there is a lot we don't know about it."

"Could it be because Edward is a vampire? I mean vampires are stronger than humans so the imprinting affects us stronger?" Esme suggested.  
>"Perhaps, it would explain is the way he is now." Carlisle agreed. "With Imslie and Red Star the imprinting was not denied and they met several times in secret." He continued.<p>

There was a certain logic to Esme's suggestion as well. It could be that a vampire's strength in this case also was his greatest weakness.

The hours passed and during this time Jasper still hadn't felt a single emotion from Edward, there was just emptiness. From Jacob he sensed faint emotions of pain but it gradually changed to calm and stillness. Jasper saw this as a good sign. They left them alone and gathered in the living room.

"Are you hungry Seth?" Esme asked him. "It's no problem, we have food here for when Bella comes over."  
>Seth was rather hungry so he gratefully accepted the offer. It was so strange, they were all nice and not at all how he thought vampires would be like. Even if that Jasper didn't speak and that blonde chick vamp seemed a bit narcissistic. He had seen her check her reflection in the window several times. They were a real family and he realized that he actually liked them. He ate the sandwich Esme made for him and thanked her.<p>

The sun had set and they all tried to occupy themselves. Emmett and Seth watched a game on the TV, Alice and Jasper played a game of chess. Now and then he channeled his emotions to check on his brother and the wolf. Rosalie was up in her room trying out a new hairstyle. Carlisle was in his study trying to see if he could find anything about his son's condition. Esme was cleaning the already spotless kitchen.

Both Jasper and Alice reacted at the same time and rushed to Edward's room.

"What is it?" Emmett called after them. The others hurried after them. They all stopped at the door. Standing on the bed was Jacob in his wolf shape. He stood over Edward, baring his teeth and snarling at the intruders. Alice had seen in a vision that he had become a more fixed blur again and Jasper had felt Jacob's emotions change from calm to strong confusion and protectiveness. Seth shifted and took a slow step towards the massive wolf.

"_**Jacob, are you alright?**_ "He lowered his head as a sign of submission, showing that he was no threat.

"_**Stay where you are."**_ He growled back at Seth using his Alfa tone. _**"Why are we here? What happened to Edward?"**_

"_**You collapsed. Remember? We didn't know what to do. We figured it had something to do with the imprinting so we brought you here to Edward. We weren't sure but we hoped it would help if you were close to each other." **_Seth took a small step forward.

The other vampires stood completely still just watching. Jasper sensed that Jacob was utterly confused but had one solid goal. Protect Edward.

"_**How are you feeling Jake?"**_ Seth asked him.

"_**I'm in pain and worried."**_ He turned his massive wolf head and looked down at Edward. He was still so very bright but something was missing. _**"I'm tired Seth. I know now that I was wrong resisting the imprinting, I was so stupid and now I might lose him." **_An eerie howl came from Jacob. Seth shrank down, the Cullens where surprised. They didn't need Edward's mind reading abilities to understand what the howl meant. It was filled with sorrow and pain.

"_**What can I do to help?" **_Seth asked.

"_**I don't know. Nothing. You should leave."**_ Jacob answered again using his Alfa influence but this time a little softer. Seth motioned with his head towards the vampires that they should leave.

"Here you are." Alice said and held out a shirt and sweat pants. Seth had forgotten that he didn't have any spare cloths with him. He took them in his mouth and went to change. When he came back they all gathered around him.

"What did he say? Did he know something about Edward?" Emmett asked.  
>"He was in so much pain and confusion. He blamed himself for causing this, he was afraid of losing Edward. I guess now at least he has acknowledged the imprinting. That's a good thing right? " Seth looked at them.<p>

"I think so. I don't believe it could cause any more harm." Carlisle answered.

XOXOXOXOX

Thanx for reading.

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	11. Change of Penname

Hi hope your all well.

I will not post a new chapter to day but soon. I promise!

However, I will change my penname starting with next chapter. The reason ... well I just feel like it ;)

My new name will be: **The Lady Insists.**

Wish you the best and hope u'll stay with the story.

Love Harmony


	12. Chapter 12

Plz read my Bio before reading my story.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

AN: Omg I'm sooo sorry for the long wait. Surprise for you is two chapters right away! :D

Thank you for reading.

Chapter 11

The Cullens needed to hunt. They decided that they would leave in groups not wanting to leave Edward and Jacob unattended. Jasper, Rosalie and Emmett left first. They wouldn't go far, and they would also be getting some blood for Edward. They figured that he would need it when he was conscious again. Seth had come to the conclusion that he liked them and he was surprised how well he got along with them, especially Alice. At the moment they were playing poker for tooth picks. Alice was in the lead. Knowing that Jacob had woken up and that he was still sane had eased a bit of the worry and stress they felt about the situation, but they were all still really concerned about Edward. But if Edward had stopped existing then Jacob would not be doing as well as he seemed to be. Madness would be there instead of feelings of worry and hurt.

It felt soft and warm. Edward opened his eyes. He knew by the smell even before he opened them that he was in his own home. He also knew that Jacob was with him. He gazed down on the wolf whose head lay on his chest. Slowly he let a hand stroke the sleeping wolf's fur. Never before had he touched Jacob when he was a wolf. Like his skin Jacob's fur also felt like velvet, it was much softer then he had thought. The wolf sighed at peace. If Edward could cry he would out of cheer happiness. He heard Jacob's unconscious thought. _**"I will never leave my sun again."**_ Edward didn't want to wake him so he keep lying still and patted the wolf. Jake loved the feeling when the hand stroked his fur. He was semi-conscious and didn't want to wake up. Then it hit him. He was alone with Edward. He raised his head and looked stunned at the dark eyes that looked back at him. _**"He's awake! Oh my god, he's awake! Is he alright? Should I get someone?" **_Jacob's thoughts were all over the place. He had feared the worst and now his sun was lying awake looking calmly back at him. His eyes, though dark, shined like stars.

"Calm down Jacob, I'm fine now" Edward assured him scratching him behind his ear. Edward's voice sounded like an angel's. Jacob backed away from Edward and shifted.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I was an ass. Had I known this would happen I would never... I can't... I'm sorry." Jacob rambled on. Edward stopped him taking his hand in his.

"Jacob, my moon, calm down." Edward said and smiled that special soft smile he had.

Jacob threw himself at Edward who embraced him. They laid there hugging, Jacob leaned his head against Edward's shoulder. Edward took a deep breath breathing in Jacobs scent, he smelled like the earth.

"I'm sorry." Jacob started to mumble again as he traced the long cracks on his lovers neck. They looked like long pinkish burn marks.

Edward sighed. It was clear that Jacob would wallow in guilt.

"Will it make you want me less?" He asked.

Jacob looked up at him chocked.

"Never!" he said forcefully.

"Then it doesn't matter." Edward said in a tone indicating that the matter was closed.

"But I .."

Jacob didn't get to finish that sentence.

Edward pulled Jacob closer and silenced the guilt filled wolf with his lips. Sure they had kissed at least in his dream Jacob knew, but this, this was like Christmas and fourth of July all at once. It was pure, hot and dirty, pure bliss. Jacob never wanted to leave this embrace or these lips. He was surprised that Edward's lips were so soft when the rest of his body sure wasn't. Jacob let his hand explore Edward's body. The thin fabric of Edward's clothes didn't stop him from clearly feeling the contours of his body. Edward sucked on Jacob's lower lip and pulled his head back, grabbing his hair.

For two long seconds their lips lost contact. Jacob took a deep breath; he hadn't noticed how much he needed some air. He eagerly returned to the lips of his vampire who welcomed him back, deepening their kiss. Fire and ice in a wet battle of tongues. They pressed closer to each other and Edward rolled Jacob on top of him. Jacob made a sound that could only be interpreted as a happy one. No matter how their embraced formed they always seemed to fit each other. There was one big difference between Jacob and Edward, Jacob was naked, something that the both of them were enjoying to the fullest, a feeling of velvet and silk. Edward slowly traced his hand down Jacobs back caressing and stroking with his hands feeling how Jacob's muscles flexed reacting to his touch. For each touch Jacob leaned in to it moaning. When Edward let one hand slip down over Jacob's bare buttocks Jacob gasped bucking his hips against Edward's. This caused the vampire to grab Jacob's ass and with both hands pressing his pelvis down while he pushed upward. He gasped out Jacob's name. Their touches became less controlled and more grabby, their hands everywhere at once.

Alice had become both embarrassed and happy about her vision. She had clearly seen Edward and Jacob (as clear as you can see two blurs) on the bed enjoying themselves. The vision changed and she saw them in the forest and other places. It wasn't to hard to figure out what they were doing.

"They are awake in about two minutes but we shouldn't interrupt them." Alice told the others.

"Why not?" Seth asked.

"You'll understand soon enough." Alice replied cryptically.

Maybe Alice had been a minute off in her prediction because one minute later it was clear to all why they shouldn't bother them. Alice was glad for her foresight as it gave her a little time to prepare herself mentally. She was glad that she could only see them as blurry figures.

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	13. Chapter 13

Plz read my Bio before reading my story.

I own nothing.

As promised two chapters in one day.

Btw you guys are the best!

XOXXOX

Chapter 12

Jasper, Esme and Rosalie were on their way back from their hunt, as agreed they hadn't stayed that far away.

Roughly one hundred meters from their house Jasper felt as though he hit a wall of emotions; lust, love, desire, raw bliss and happiness. All these emotions came crushing down on him at once; especially strong were love, lust and desire. He sometimes wished that he didn't have this ability but he was very grateful that he didn't have Edwards or Alice abilities either. Feeling them was one thing but to actually see the things he felt that was not something he would have enjoyed. He figured he would suffer from insanity at first glance.

"They are... hmm… awake." Jasper said to Rosalie and Esme. Just how awake, he figured, they would find out soon enough.

Carlisle, Emmett, Seth and Alice sat in the living room with the TV volume on high. It helped to drown out some of the noise from upstairs, but not all. As soon as Alice saw the trio coming thru the door she jumped up from the couch.

"It's your turn now. Enjoy the TV program. She winked at Jasper as she passed him on the way out. She was followed by an extremely embarrassed Seth who mumbled something about going home to update the pack and Jacob's father, adding something about never ever being able to look Jacob in the eye again. Emmett grinned at Rosalie.

"They are almost as bad as us babe." He kissed her cheek and ran after Alice.

Being a doctor Carlisle knew the thought of naked bodies and other very healthy expression of mating shouldn't bother him. That said, the voice that called out his lovers name was also his son. He turned to Esme who looked happy and slightly embarrassed.

"I believe they are all right but we should keep an eye on them just a bit longer."

"Are you sure that's needed." Rosalie said with sarcasm. She was truly glad that Edward and Jacob was awake and... fine. But they could turn the volume down.

Fortunate for Jasper Esme and Rosalie the noise didn't continue on the same level for long.

They were both breathing heavily. Jacob's cheeks were flushed red, eyes bright from excitement. Edward's always so carefully messy hair was still a mess but not so carefully fixed. Edward heard Jacob's heart beat violently inside his chest and the wolf's blood rushed like a river inside his veins. Edward did actually growl as he pushed his lover of him and the bed. Jacob landed hard on the floor.

"What the hell?" Jacob growled back at him.

"Jacob we have to stop." Edward said and tried to focus and calm down.

"What, why? Did I do something wrong?" Jacob asked confused.

"No, no, definitely not. It's the opposite, you're doing it to well. You taste and smell too good for your own good right now." Edward explained pulling himself up and leaned against the headboard.

It took a few seconds before Jacob understood what he meant.

"Oh, right."Jacob looked in to Edwards eyes. The usually melted golden color had faded and now the Edwards eyes were pitch black.

"Over there on the chair. Put on the shirt and the sweats, I can't have you naked around me right now." Edward closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. Jacob put on the clothes and stayed by the desk, glancing at Edward. He wasn't afraid of Edward like this, more curious.

"Don't be afraid my moon. I would never, and I don't think could, hurt you. It's just the sound of your blood... It made me hungry." Edward was utterly embarrassed that he had growled at Jacob because of hunger.

"You don't think that you could bite me? Even if you were starving, you don't think you would?" Jacob didn't mean to offend him, he was really curious.

"I believe that if I would feed on you it would mean that I was hurting you. Now that you have become my only reason for existing, hurting you would be impossible. I rather stop existing than hurt you." Edward was dead serious, meaning every word.

"But you wish I wasn't so close to you when you're hungry? Does it cause you pain?" Jacob stayed put at the desk. If being close to Edward caused him pain when he was hungry he had no problem of getting some space between them.

"No, not pain, but it does increase my hunger in a uncomfortable way. It's easier if we keep a distance when I'm hungry, but only then." Edward said "I always want you close." Edward gave Jacob that special soft smile that made him feel like he was in seventh heaven. There was a light knock on the door..

"Come in." Edward said. It was Esme.

"I'm sorry for disturbing you but I thought you might be hungry, you need to eat Edward." Esme said and held up some type of plastic bag. Jacob got the hint.

"Yeah, you should eat Eddie. I've got some human stuff I need to do anyway." Jacob gave Esme a nod and left the room.

Jacob really needed a few moments to himself. He went to the bathroom and did all the necessary human things. He stopped to look in the mirror. He wasn't as pale as before; the dark circles under his eyes were still there even if they had started to fade a bit. The image of Edward's cracks that reached from where his heart had been half way up his throat flooded his memories. It was all his fault. Jacob knew that if he hadn't been so stubborn, Edward would never had had to suffer from the pain he caused him. He would never stop trying to make up for what he had done to Edward. He hit the sink with his fist. Damn him and his stubbornness.

"Jacob there is food in the kitchen if you want." Emmett said to him from the other side of the door.

Previously he had been too preoccupied to think about food but now he felt that he was really hungry. Alice had made him a big bowl of pasta with different things mixed in it. He stood by the kitchen counter as he gratefully ate the food prepared for him. Jasper felt a bit like a spy standing in the hallway leading in to the kitchen. He was tuning in on Jacobs feelings making sure everything was all right, and it was. It was even better, Jacob was calm and happy filled with love. Jasper had done the same with Edward and they both shared the same type of bliss. Jasper was pleased.

Jacob finished eating and left the bowl on the kitchen counter and headed back to Edwards room. He thought as he walked that even if there was so many people in the house he didn't encounter anyone. True it was a big house, it didn't bother him just an observation. Esme had left Edwards room and he was still sitting on the bed leaning against the headboard. When he saw Jacob he smiled feeling so happy. Jacob smiled back equally happy, he felt so incredibly loved. Edward reached out his hands beckoning Jacob to come to him. That he did gladly. He snuggled up in Edwards embrace leaning his back against his chest. Edward wrapped his arms around him. They just sat on the bed being content with being close to each other.

"Did you have your human moment?" Edward asked him and gave him a squeeze.

"Yeah I did. Tell me honestly Edward how are you?" Jacob was worried about the cracks, he knew they would never disappear, fade a little maybe, but never be gone. He was worried that they caused Edward pain.

"I'm fine. Better than fine Jacob." Edward assured him stroking his fingers back and forth on Jacob's arm .

"There is one thing though." Not sounding pleased.

Jacob froze. Edward felt him tense up.

"What's that?" He asked cautiously

"Eddie?" Edward said with a frown.

"Eddie what?" Jacob didn't understand what he was talking about.

"You think that you will be calling me Eddie?" Edward clarified.

Jacob laughed and relaxed.

"Yeah of course. What else would I call you? I can't go around calling you my 'sun'."

"Why not? You are my precious moon." Edward said calmly.

"No Eddie." Jacob said insisting on the ridiculous nickname. "You can't go around calling me 'your moon' in public. I would never hear the end of it from the pack." He could well imagine how the pack would tease him about it.

"Then, what should I call you?" Edward asked him.

"I don't know. Jacob or Jake I guess."

"But that's what everyone calls you. I want a name only I can use." Edward knew he sounded childish but it would mean a lot to him.

"Ok, let's compromise. You call me Jacob or Jake when we are in public but when we are alone you can call me whatever nickname you want. Also I get to call you Eddie." Jacob said sounding pleased.

"Wait a minute. I only get to call you 'my moon' when we are alone but you get to call me Eddie twenty-four-seven. That's not fair." Edward disagreed.

"_**I could never have him call me 'moon' in public. Maybe if I called him Ed instead of Eddie and he get to call me babe... no no. Hun maybe yeah that's better than babe."**_

Edward heard it all and smiled. He intertwined their fingers lift up their hands and kissed Jacobs.

"Well then hun, it's agreed." Edward said and placed a chaste kiss on his neck.

Jacob was surprised for a moment. He hadn't really gotten used to Ed's mindreading thing yet.

"Agreed" He said and they meet in the softest of kisses.

"I love you." Edward whispered in to his lover's ear.

If Jacob could he would have been glowing from the happiness he felt hearing those three words.

Their moment was interrupted by Jacob's cellphone ringing. He picked it up and saw that the caller was his dad. Immediately he left the comfort of Edwards embrace and stood up beside the bed. He knew his that couldn't see them but talking to his father while being snuggled up against Edward was just... awkward.

Edward could have listened to the phone call but his mind was filled with other thoughts. He had said "I love you". He had anticipated that Jacob would say it back. He would wouldn't he. He knew it was silly but not hearing it back right away made him feel a bit insecure.

XOXOXOX

Reviews?


	14. Chapter 14

Plz read my Bio before reading my story.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Thank you all for reading this story. I've enjoyed writing it.

"_And now the time has come to for us to face the final 'chapter'  
>Yes, there were times, I'm sure you knew<br>When I bit off more than I could chew.  
>But through it all, when there was doubt,<br>I ate it up and spit it out.  
>I faced it all and I stood tall;<br>And did it my way._"/ Frank Sinatra (and in my case so true)

XOXOX

Chapter 13

"I need to go home," Jacob said as he put his phone back in his pocket. "Dad want's me back. Seth told him that I'm awake.

Edward, or Ed as he would form now on be called, nodded. He didn't really want Jacob to leave.

"So I'll see you tomorrow, or would you like a secret night visit?" Edward asked with a grin.

"Yeah right, the whole pack would know if you came. Not so secret. I think I need to spend some time with my dad. I know he's been worried about me. Not that I wouldn't have liked a nightly visit," Jacob smiled back at his sun.

"Your right it might not be a very good first impression. I think I should introduce myself to your father when it's daytime," Ed said and got up from the bed.

"_**Introduce him to my dad like a formal... I... Why he knows who he is."**_

Jacob didn't know exactly why but introducing Ed to his dad, making it a formal introduction, well it made him feel a bit embarrassed. Not of Edward, no it was more like he was shy in front of his dad. Edward had of course heard him and was about to ask why. But Jacob stopped him as he stepped up to Edward and kissed him, licking Ed's lower lip asking for access. He was granted the access and they pressed closer together Jacob sliding up his hand letting it tangle in his lover's hair. Edward moaned softly, his hair was a soft spot. He could feel Jacob finishing the kiss and backing away, but he wasn't finished yet. If they weren't going to see each other until next morning he needed a bigger dose of moonshine. He put his arms around Jacobs's waist and pulled him back in, kissing him with more force. A small whimper came from Jacob before he forcefully pulled back from Edward breathing fast.

"We... I... If we don't stop now I'll never be able to leave," Jacob said.

"I don't mind," Edward said leaning in once more. His lips so very close, cold breath caressing Jacob's swollen lips. He felt silk like hands making their way under his shirt and up his back.

"But your father wants you to come home." Edward said and backed off.

"_**Oh, hey wait a minute... that's evil." **_Jacob felt slightly dazed; his lover chuckled at his thought.

"Hun I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah Ed tomorrow. Bye"

Jacob left and headed to the forest. Before he shifted he took of his clothes and laid them next to a tree. He knew Ed would find them.

Edward sighed. Usually the nights would pass rather quickly but know it felt like morning would never come. Emmett called for him. He had already fed but asked him if he would like to go out hunting anyway, maybe a mountain lion. Edward thanked him. The little he had had from Esme wasn't really enough and this would keep him occupied.

When Jacob came home he went in to the garage and put on some spare clothes before he went in to the house and hugged his dad.

"I'm glad you are all right. Never scare me like that again!" His dad said and hugged him again. He had been terrified that he would lose him.

"Did you and Edward settle things?"

"Yeah, it´s cool dad, we fixed things." Jacob remembered Ed wanting to meet his dad make it formal. He was proud of Edward but saying to his dad "Dad this is my boyfriend" well it was awkward. He had never brought home a girlfriend or boyfriend before. Ok, so he'd never had either before, but still.

"That's good Jake." Billy said and glanced up at his son, he looked fine happy.

Jacob and his dad didn't have those deep feeling talks, of course if needed they would always listen to each other but if they could they would avoid those ´chick flick moments ´as Jacob called them. They ate, talked, played some cards just the two of them. They both enjoyed the calm and the knowledge that they were all fine.

It was Friday morning and Jacob rode his bike to school. He was wondering if Ed would be waiting for him, perhaps he would be waiting at the parking lot. They did have first class biology together, suddenly he felt nervous. When did he become such a girl? Standing while casually leaning against his sliver Volvo Edward smiled brightly as he saw Jacob coming up the parking lot. When he parked next to the Volvo he wasn't nervous anymore.

"Hi" He smiled at the bright sun in front of him.

"Hi, sleep well?" Edward asked and leaned in to kiss him. Jacob leaned in as well and gave Edward a quick peck on the lips.

"Yeah thanks. We should get going." Jacob said and started walking to the school entrance.

"_**Ok, that was weird" **_Edward thought. He had missed Jacob like crazy and wanted nothing more than take his beloved in his arms while kissing him madly. Ed caught up and they walked in together. They didn't usually sit together at this class but Edward sat down next to him. Jacob's surprised lab partner looked at his occupied seat and then sat down at Edwards desk. The class cheered when the teacher rolled in the TV. It was a movie lesson.

Edward sighed inwardly. These so called 'educational' DVD's were extremely boring and this was no exception. It was about mitoses. The teacher pressed play and switched off the lights. Edward felt how Jacob leaned in against him a warm hand took his under the desk. They didn't need the florescent lights to be on to see each other. It was another positive aspect of being supernatural, heightened sight. They sat there holding hands looking at each other. Edward promised that he would never again be annoyed about Rosalie's and Emmett's 'you are the only one in the world' moments again. He himself would like to have them always with Jacob, his moon. Jacob felt at peace, he was still easily dazzled by Edward. He slowly made circles on the silk like hand with his thumb. "**_I lov__e_ _y_ou **" Jacob new Edward had heard him. He had sent his thought, or at least tried, to send it directly to Edward. What ever emotions Edward had for Jacob exploded by ten. These three words filled him up with the warmth he'd been missing. The lights were turned on again and immediately Jacob let go of Edwards hand and straightened in his chair. Again Edward frowned at this. He wouldn't mind staying the way they were.

"Ed, I got math next, see you later. " Jacob said.

"Yeah, ok hun, I'll meet you for lunch." Edward replied. He noticed how Jacob tensed up for half a second, then he smiled.

"Yeah great" Was his only response as his smile grew.

The third lesson of the day had ended and Jacob was on his way to the school cafeteria. He wondered if Edward would really meet up with him. He had wanted to be more open with Edward but he was a bit shy in public,

"Hey Jake!" Mike Newton called out to him.

"Hey Mike." Jacob felt a bit annoyed; he wanted to meet up with Edward. He wasn't really in the mood for small talk with Mike.

"Yeah, eh… well I called you Wednesday but you didn't answer." Mike said tugging at the sleeve of his shirt. He had been so sure and confident that he would have some quality time with Jacob alone in the dark movie theater. He had wondered if Jacob had someone else he favored above him. But it wasn't likely he had concluded because Jacob had never shown anyone any interest.

"Oh ok, what did you want?" Jacob had completely forgotten the trivial movie date they had agreed upon.

"Well you know. You, me and a movie..." Mike wasn't feeling so sure of himself anymore.

"Yeah sorry something came up, a family thing." Jacob said.

"Ok, but wanna do something this weekend?" Mike asked hopefully glad that he wasn't stood up because of someone else.

"I don't know Mike I think I'll be busy this weekend." Jacob said.

"Really? Well if you get some free time you can call me." Mike pushed on.

"I'm afraid that Jacob won't be free for a very long time." Edward said as he came up to them putting his arm around Jacob's waist. The wolf felt butterflies in his stomach.

"Yeah, sorry Mike I'll be very busy." Jacob said and smiled up at Edward.

"Want to go and eat hun?" Edward asked. Jacob nodded in response.

"Later Mike" Jacob called back over his shoulder. Mike Newton stood there eyes wide with surprise.

They got their food and sat down at the "Cullen" table. Whispers and glances followed them, somehow during the week Jacob and Edward had become a couple. That was big news.

At the table the rest of the Cullen clan sat and pretended to eat. They may not be a conventional family sharing DNA but they were a family and the bond of love kept them all together.

XOXOXOXXO

Thanx a million all you readers and reviewers for staying with this story. I have really enjoyed writing it. :D :D Happiness for everyone !

I have a Sequel to this story called _**"Your last breath."**_ I'm currently writing it and hope you will like it as well... If I choose to publish it.

Here is a summery of it:

J_**acob is worried about the Edward meeting his dad. Sports like baseball is always fun when playing with supernatural abilities. Strangers are coming to town. Dancing and tuxedos is it really a terrible thing? How do you save a life? **_

(Maybe not the best summery but I'll think you'll have to read it to see if you like it. ^^)


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